'What's it to do with you?', I hear you ask.
I know, I am a failure at relationships, always have been, this time around now I've been single for just over a year. The thing is, I have been through it, the highs and lows, the happy days and the arguments, so I know.
This blog is only a little musing about what it's all about, from a personal fitness point of view, how 'love' lust and relationships change our thoughts on our own bodies, how, ultimately it's a chemical thing!
I can remember fancying someone, I remember those little hormone surges and face flushes, although I didn't realise at the time just what they were, you don't at that age, do you? That intense feeling of teenage passion, writing this takes me back to a moment back in secondary school, but let's not go there, but that feeling, where nothing else matters in the world because, let's just say, 'Martin' brushed past you, or caught your eye, those moments are priceless at any age.
Your body is evolving daily during those years, but isn't it still, even years on, with other hormonal changes in life - mainly affecting women, aren't we lucky?!
For me, personally, in a relationship, I feel a daily struggle to look and be the best I can be (main reason why I'm single) and, being honest with you, as I always am, being in certain relationships have not been healthy for me, as they brought about my old eating-disorder nemesis. This changed me, causing pressure, mood swings, depression eventually leading to relationship break-up. The power of hindsight eh?
So, I am one extreme, let's discuss the other......how about being so content and happy in your relationship that you don't worry about your appearance? It happens, the comfort, thinking that they will love you no matter what you look like, it's you they love. This leads to weight gain, lethargy and ultimately ill-health.
These are two extremes of what could happen to affect your fitness and health in a relationship. Of course there are many wonderful happy endings in between.
Let's talk about the endings though.....this is a big life-game-changer for us, and again I think there are two distinct things that happen.
Break-up weight-loss! From my point of view, this is a form of self-torture, punishing yourself for not being successful in your relationship, or for letting them cheat on you, manipulate you, or worse, domestic violence. You starve yourself, you start to lose weight, you start feeling better about yourself...this is the time to knock it on the head, but some people continue, then make themselves very ill.
Some people call post break-up 'preparing yourself for the market again' it's always used in a comical way, the depth of the problem could make or 'actually' break a person's spirit.
The people who deal with upset by eating food.....the reverse happens.....I don't know about that personally so I can't say what goes on in a person's mind, but it's still self-destruct and ultimately bad for your health and well-being.
The human heart is a teeny tiny complex organ, without it, well the obvious occurs.
If you want to find true love this valentines day, have a look at what you are doing to yourself, are you in a happy place? Do you eat in a healthy way? Do you exercise regularly? Do you let your fears and worries run your life? Is your relationship with your partner really good for you, or would you actually be in a better place on your own?
It's YOU, that you need to love, you need to do this with exercise, healthy food, good friends, getting outdoors, taking up a new hobby, just do anything, correct anything that is wrong and love yourself.
Of course, I am here to help too, even if you just need to go and punch the pads and bags once a week to get rid of your work stress, have a run on the coast path, do burpees on the beach, whatever it is I can help with, happy to give it a shot.
Happy an amazing Valentines week everyone and remember, it's all about YOU!
